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Mother's Day Tributes and Healing

Mama Bear

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Dec 28, 2020
Back in March @Pearlized posted about Mother's Day in the UK. That got me thinking. Mother's Day is such a mixed bag. There are children like me who have a gapping hole in my heart that just never seems to heal. This crater was created the second I could feel something was horribly wrong with my mom only to find a day later she'd been killed - and my family was not notified because the docs in the hospital treated her based on a stranger's medical record. So when they induced a massive blowout heart attack because of their incompetence the hospital staff had been calling the wrong family to tell them their mother was dead. The staff didn't even believe they had a case of mistaken identity when the woman herself got on the phone and said, "Uh, I'm Mrs. XYZ and I'm not dead."

Then there are others who had not so great, abusive, distant, non-loving, et all relationships with their moms - some of them momsters. Mother's Day, though completely man-made, can be a trigger.

Additionally, over the years, any number of clients and friends have had a tough time emotionally and mentally because they recognixed they had not been great moms.

How about those that want to honor their mom here do so. Also, those who seek healing and support - let us know what you need. Perhaps we can all promise not to tell you what to do or how you should feel. If you want to just talk, state that. If you want suggestions or observations or particular forms of healing, state that. We will do our best to help.

I mean, we ARE all here to do good for animals. Right?

This is my mom, Patricia B. Carter.



Patricia-Barber-Carter-Bernadette-Mom-750x500.jpg
 

Mark Ravenheart

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Joined
May 28, 2021
Location
U.S.A.
My mom has been gone 5 years come the 28th of April, (next Thursday). We were close except for when she would talk hateful or when she criticized me. My mom was not perfect, but I now understand that she wanted better for me and that she did her best for me and my siblings. When I was younger she was my best friend and we were very close.

Life was good except when dad drank, then all hell would break loose, but momma was the backbone of our family. She literally kept the family together and got us through hard times. She loved and protected me and I believe she is the reason that I turned out as I did. Loving, caring, and compassionate... rather than bitter and angry.

Although we would exchange hurtful words occasionally, we were actually really close and I could not have wished for a better mother. When I was young, we would make sun catchers and do other art projects together, from painting Christmas ornaments to hand-dipping taper candles. She also encouraged me to explore my psychic abilities. We made a game of Zener cards and we would test one another's intuition. I had a very strong mother-son bond with her for which I am eternally grateful.

She had no filter for her mouth sometimes, but it was fairly easy to overlook and often easy to understand. She had her own demons which she kept hidden from my brother, sister, and me. (or so she thought). When we would ask mom, Why are you crying?" ...the answer was always, "No reason, I just felt like crying"....she would never saddle us with adult responsibilities.

I was very fortunate. The last time I saw my mom, she was on her deathbed but fortunately, she was asleep and that is how she passed...peacefully sleeping.

Her name was Wilma Barnett, she was 81 years old when she transitioned. I miss her dearly!!!
Here is a picture of her...she had just had her nails done for the very first time.

Mom With burgandy nails.jpg

I welcome comments, observations, etc.

Thanks for letting me share.

M. Raven
 
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Mama Bear

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Dec 28, 2020
Thanks for chiming in. So happy you had this experience with your mom in this life. That is just so cool you worked together on building intuition! Does she come visit you now? If so, would you mind letting us know how you recognize her? It can be helpful to others who aren't sure if they had a visistation or not.
 

Mark Ravenheart

Well-known member
Joined
May 28, 2021
Location
U.S.A.
Thanks for chiming in. So happy you had this experience with your mom in this life.
You are most welcome thanks for allowing me to speak about her. I was very fortunate to have had her as my mother.
That is just so cool you worked together on building intuition!
Yes, she also would find four-leaf clovers and she passed that ability on to me, and I think it is because she didn't teach me that I couldn't do it. I just always believed I could and I have picked them out of a field of clover.
Does she come visit you now? If so, would you mind letting us know how you recognize her? It can be helpful to others who aren't sure if they had a visistation or not.
Mom doesn't visit me often. Sometimes I will smell the perfume she wore and I will suddenly get visuals and memories vividly flashing through my mind of when she was alive and happy. It seems to me that she is sitting in the room with me. I will feel compelled to talk out loud to her and she presents the same attitude she had when alive. I don't know how it works for other people, but mom visits occasionally and more often when I am grieving for her. I am sorry if this is not helpful. I guess that it's just the way it works for me.
 

Mama Bear

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Dec 28, 2020
You are most welcome thanks for allowing me to speak about her. I was very fortunate to have had her as my mother.

Yes, she also would find four-leaf clovers and she passed that ability on to me, and I think it is because she didn't teach me that I couldn't do it. I just always believed I could and I have picked them out of a field of clover.

Mom doesn't visit me often. Sometimes I will smell the perfume she wore and I will suddenly get visuals and memories vividly flashing through my mind of when she was alive and happy. It seems to me that she is sitting in the room with me. I will feel compelled to talk out loud to her and she presents the same attitude she had when alive. I don't know how it works for other people, but mom visits occasionally and more often when I am grieving for her. I am sorry if this is not helpful. I guess that it's just the way it works for me.

It works differently for each person. Of course you are helping. Even just talking about it is helpful because so many folks don't dare for fear others will think they are crazy or one of 'those' people. That's so awesome you talk to her out loud!
 

Mark Ravenheart

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Joined
May 28, 2021
Location
U.S.A.
you are helping. Even just talking about it is helpful...
I am happy to help whenever I can.
That's so awesome you talk to her out loud!
I had my mom's hospital bed and I slept in it for a couple of years. Occasionally, it would squeak as if someone had been sitting on the bed and then stood up. I would always say out loud, "Mama is that you?" and that is how I got started talking to her out loud.

Thank you so much for letting me share about my Mom.

M. Raven
 

Mama Bear

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Dec 28, 2020
I am happy to help whenever I can.

I had my mom's hospital bed and I slept in it for a couple of years. Occasionally, it would squeak as if someone had been sitting on the bed and then stood up. I would always say out loud, "Mama is that you?" and that is how I got started talking to her out loud.

Thank you so much for letting me share about my Mom.

M. Raven

Ooooo...that's big energy you cocooned yourself in - literally. Sleeping in someone's bed means you are 'cocooned' in their energy because the bed/frame/sheets/space is now imprinted with all their thoughts, feelings, etc. Not knowing that, when my mom was killed, I lived at her house for a year and slept in her room instead of mine. OMG the dreams and crazy experiences. I truly thought I was losing it because of the grief. Now I know it was visitation after visitation and psychic activity that was off the charts - no drugs or alcohol were involved. Just straight up metaphysical madness. LOL Anything going on like that for you?
 

Mark Ravenheart

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Joined
May 28, 2021
Location
U.S.A.
Ooooo...that's big energy you cocooned yourself in - literally. Sleeping in someone's bed means you are 'cocooned' in their energy because the bed/frame/sheets/space is now imprinted with all their thoughts, feelings, etc. Not knowing that, when my mom was killed, I lived at her house for a year and slept in her room instead of mine. OMG the dreams and crazy experiences. I truly thought I was losing it because of the grief. Now I know it was visitation after visitation and psychic activity that was off the charts - no drugs or alcohol were involved. Just straight up metaphysical madness. LOL Anything going on like that for you?
I just recently moved and I bought a new bed and the hospital bed was donated to charity. However, I did have lots of vivid dreams while sleeping in that bed and I would often wake to see a shadowy figure standing in the doorway. That doesn't happen anymore. I sleep more soundly since getting the new bed.
 

TheLastChanceCrone

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Mar 6, 2021
Location
Ohio
My mother hasn't passed. She's still here, but we have a very awkward relationship. I love her, and try to keep things light so we don't end up in a fight because of something stupid. She's 81. I know a lot of people who say at this point, just keep it light, pleasant and don't say anything you will regret.
 

Mark Ravenheart

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May 28, 2021
Location
U.S.A.
Thank you for sharing @TheLastChanceCrone. I really like the idea of keeping things light and pleasant. In my estimation, those are wise words. *(Also, I just thot it was a coincidence that my mother lived to be 81, so I thot I'd mention it).

Bright Blessings
M Raven
 

Mama Bear

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Dec 28, 2020
My mother hasn't passed. She's still here, but we have a very awkward relationship. I love her, and try to keep things light so we don't end up in a fight because of something stupid. She's 81. I know a lot of people who say at this point, just keep it light, pleasant and don't say anything you will regret.

Akward relationships with mom can be challenging for sure. By keeping things light it sounds like you're doing a great service to her and yourself.
 

Mama Bear

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Dec 28, 2020
I'm really surprised more of the Wild Pack doesn't want to chime in about their mom. Anybody wanna take a guess as to why? I'm really scratching my head on this one...


Thinking What GIF by H.E.R.
 

Keith20222002

Member
Joined
Jul 15, 2021
Location
Oakland Maine
Hi everyone, I'm just seeing this post. Me and mom as always have different opinions on something. And thought we my fight and go are own ways, we always come back to one another. Mom is a great lady and an great friend. I love how she has thought me that you need to develop your own ways but always be there for family. She is an amazing person and woman. She is one that as the years she get older, the more I see my grandmother in her, and how all of the past of teaching that her mom as thought her was pass down to us. I my mom and and when I'm a dad I can pass on what she has thought all of us 3 kids.
 

TheLastChanceCrone

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Joined
Mar 6, 2021
Location
Ohio
Anybody wanna take a guess as to why?
I almost did not post mine. I know that my reason at the time was my relationship with her is so bloody complicated, someone said today the perfect statement;

Family is complicated for me. I love them. I long for them. Yet I feel I am not a part of them.

I'm the odd one of the family - on the spectrum, non-binary gender fluid, pagan, eclectic witch, metaphysical practitioner, non-conformist, vintage feminist, pro-choice.....

Everything my family isn't.

I know a lot of people who love their parents but do not want or have anything to do with them because of the judgement and pressure they put upon their children to fit a specific mold, even as adults.
 

DARKSHINEZ

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Joined
Jun 15, 2021
Location
CA, USA
Love + to the Mothers within us ...

Love, Compassion, Honor, Respect to all the Mothering essences within each being - no matter that being [human male, human female, human mixed, domesticated animal, wild animal, etc. and all that may present itself to each of us in the moment] ...

And to Earth, that is most often stated as a "Mother" ...

I am for the Mother that embraces all - masculine, feminine, etc. and honors, respects, considers, cherishes +, connects, relates, empathizes, sympathizes, protects, etc., that is truthful, transparent ...

I honor and celebrate the Mothering within each of us and our specific expressions moment to moment, daily ...
I continue to "Mother" myself [and Father and Parent] - my parents "did their best".

I shall work with a deck and ask: what do I need to know now [around Mothering or ?]? Or something like this - simple ...
 
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